I was originally going to make this a Top 10 list, but it would be unreasonable for me to suggest that these are the ten best links on the Internet. (By contrast, it was quite reasonable for me to suggest that last week's blog contained the ten best sketches in the history of Saturday Night Live.) So instead, I'm just going to give you ten links that may or may not be the best on the Internet. They are, at the very least, a good way to waste some time. So...
1. Let's Get Ready to Bumble! As many of you know, I am a big Bill Simmons fan, and my favorite things to read are his running diaries. This one is about Fox's Celebrity Boxing II. If you want to know why I like this guy, read this article.
Time for our second match, which can only be described like this: "Screech vs. Horshack."
2. Moms Gone Wild. Very interesting Vanity Fair article about celebrity mothers -- specifically Lynne Spears, Kathy Hilton, and Dina Lohan -- and if reading this doesn't remind you of Amy Poehler in Mean Girls, then you clearly did not see that movie.
Kathy sobbed when Paris was sentenced to jail for driving with a suspended license, calling the 23-day stint "Paris-cide."
3. MJH's Lovechildren. You'll love this. Mac, Jurko, and Harry, my favorite drive time sports talk radio show hosts, have a page of sports-related look-a-likes that they call their lovechildren. For example, Charlotte Bobcats shooting guard Adam Morrison is the lovechild of Almost Famous actors Billy Crudup and Patrick Fugit.
4. One Red Paperclip. You may have heard about this story, but here's a place that you can track it. This guy -- Kyle MacDonald -- started with one red paperclip and kept trading it for slightly bigger stuff until he got a house. At the end of each blog entry, it says, "Click here to see who I traded my _____ with." Just click there and you'll go through the 14 steps it took him to get the house.
Now a pen, especially a fish pen, is a hard object to let go. But even with the awesome writing powers it may possess, you've gotta' face the facts: A fish pen can't really help you open a cupboard.
5. David Letterman's 9/11 Monologue. As you may have deduced from the title, this is not a funny link. It is, however, interesting, and that was all that I ever claimed that these things would be. I remember seeing him deliver this and liking him a lot better. (And I didn't have a problem with him before, unlike my wife.)
There is only one requirement for any of us, and that is to be courageous, because courage, as you might know, defines all other human behavior.
6. Shawshank Minute. This, on the other hand, is really, really funny. A spoof (even thought I don't like that word) on one of the best movies of all-time. NOTE: There's a bad word at the end, so make sure you're in a place where bad words are acceptable.
Straight out of prison, I'm a Morgan Free Man.
7. Six Degrees of Celebreality. Great game on vh1.com. An online version of a road trip staple in the Baker car.
Even Andy Rooney knows more about pop culture than you!
8. Bryan Pittman, Long Snapper. Okay, so I understand that not everyone who reads this is interested in football. In fact, many of you probably didn't even realize that "long snapper" was a football term. Regardless, I think this is awesome. Just watch it.
All right, honey, we're going for a short snap on the T.P.
9. Who is Wrong? If I had the time to create a real web site, this is the kind of web site that I would create. Is Alex Rodriguez worth $30 million? What's better, beer or chocolate? What's the best R. Kelly song of all-time? This site covers all of these topics and more.
You're not being specific. To generalize and say that "tap water is better" leaves a big hole in your argument. I'll take an Aquafina over the murky reservoirs of South America, thanks.
10. Free Rice. My buddy Claire recommended this one last week. If you're smart, the United Nations World Food Program gets free rice. If you're not, go back and play some more Celebreality games.
WARNING: This game may make you smarter. It may improve your speaking, writing, thinking, grades, job performance...
That's it for today.