Do you watch The Office? (NOTE: This entry is not going to be about The Office. I promise. But if you don't, you really, really should.) Anyway, there's one episode where March Madness has just ended, and everyone around the office is still so psyched to gamble that they start betting on random stuff like how many jelly beans are in the dish on Pam's desk and how long it will take Kelly to explain Netflix to Ryan. Well, we are smack dab in the middle of the greatest 48 hours of my year--the first two days of the NCAA men's basketball tournament--and I feel like a gambling addict. I need to bet on stuff. So I remembered an earlier blog ("the endorsement: the endorsement") in which I mentioned bodog.com. It's a betting web site. And while I usually check out stuff like lines on football games and odds on which team is most likely to win the NCAA tourney, they do have pages with things like "Celebrity Betting" and "Television & Film Betting." And I'm guessing that that would appeal to my audience a little more. Here's the web site. And here are some of the most interesting lines (my picks are in bold):
Who will Britney Spears' character mention as part of a joke during her cameo appearance on CBS sitcom 'How I Met Your Mother'?
Kevin Federline, Justin Timberlake, Lindsay Lohan, Paris Hilton, Britney Spears, The Paparazzi
(I think the HIMYM writers are too clever to do something obvious like KF or PH. Unfortunately, saying herself only pays out 1/2, which means that if I bet $100, I only get $150 back. Evidently, the smart money is on Britney. And that's something you don't hear every day.)
Who will be the winner of American Idol 7?
(I'm not going to list everyone because if you watch the show, you know them, and if you don't, you're not interested. Anyway, I was all ready to say Chikeze because he's my guy, but the odds are 40/1--as opposed to 4/1 for Carly Smithson and David Cook or 14/1 for Michael Johns. I totally thought Chikeze was a front-runner. That guy's awesome. Lest you doubt me, check out his performance of "She's A Woman.")
Who will be the winner of Dancing With The Stars 6?
(To paraphrase Michael Scott, I live by one rule: Don't watch Dancing With The Stars. No way. Very stupid show. But I live by another rule: When you have the chance to bet on Steve Guttenberg, you do it.)
What country will Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt's next adopted child be from?
(Again, there are a lot of options, but the shocker: the United States is going off at 8/1. That makes it the 2nd-most likely option. Doesn't it seem unlikely that they would have all these kids from Cambodia and the like, then adopt some kid from Phoenix? I'm going with Afghanistan. Incidentally, Africa is the 7/1 favorite. However, Bodog people, it's not a country.)
What will Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt name their next biological child together?
(The favorite? Marcheline. The long-shot? Jon. That's how mixed up the world is right now. Anyway, I like the 12/1 odds on Bertrand.)
Will iTunes surpass Wal-Mart to become the No. 1 U.S. music retailer in 2008?
(Based on the number of little punks that I have to yell at for listening to their iPods while I'm explaining restrictive and non-restrictive clauses, I'm going to say Yes.)
Who will be named as the Democratic candidate for the 2008 U.S. Presidential Election?
(I'm betting on and voting for Barack Obama, of course, but here's something interesting: the Obaminator is going off at 3/10, and Hillary is the 12/5 underdog, but you can still take the "Field" at 100/1. Are people putting money down in the hopes that Dennis Kucinich makes a last-second leap?)
Who will be the next President of the United States?
(Most of you will be glad to know that B.O. is the favorite, but John McCain is thisclose. Hillary is not.)
Who will win the next UK general election?
(I'm picking the Liberal Democrats in a last-second upset. I'm telling you, they're the Villanova of the UK general elections!)
Okay, I have to run. There's basketball on in 4 hours.